The question that every Doer asks when faced with one of her limitations is this:
What’s wrong with me?
First, let me set the record straight.
NOTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU
Like every other personality type you have weaknesses and gaps. Your weaknesses will be different than the Improvers, Connecters, and Stabilizers you know, but that doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with you.
Second, your personality weaknesses are normal and to be expected, and they are just strengths that have gone too far. It’s important to realize this so that you don’t try to deny or hide your weaknesses. Yes, they need management. They need the help of Jesus. But, if you throw out your weaknesses, you throw your strengths out too.
When contemplating your “issues,” there are five questions that you, as a Doer, usually ask in an effort to understand yourself. As you read these, I hope that you will keep two things in mind:
- Nothing is wrong with you. Every Doer struggles with these weaknesses.
- Each weakness sources from a strength. This awareness can keep you from abandoning your weakness so it can be used as a strength.
THE FIVE CONCERNS OF A DOER
1. Why am I so impatient? When someone or something blocks you from getting something done, you get impatient. Very impatient. This weakness comes from the strength of being goal-focused.
2. Why am I so bossy? In an effort to maintain control (remember control is a good thing, controlling is not), you can get domineering. This weakness comes from the strength of being directive.
3. Why do I hurt other’s feelings? Because you value time, you often become abrupt and blunt when speaking to others. You say what you mean, but don’t consider how it might be received. This weakness comes from the strength of candor.
4. Why don’t I ask for help? You have what’s called agency, the capacity to act without the input of others and make your own choices, but you often neglect to involve others in your plans. This weakness comes from the strength of independence.
5. Why can’t I relax? You live in a constant state of motion, executing your to-do lists, and getting stuff done. Your sense of commitment to the tasks at hand makes it hard to sit down. This weakness comes from the strength of responsibility.
MANAGE NOT OBSESS
Finally, the goal is to manage your weaknesses but not to spend all your efforts on them. You need to plug the leaks in your boat, but if you want to actually go somewhere, you’ll need to steward your God-given strengths.
For more information on how to manage each of these weaknesses and steward your strengths, check out the Doer ebook or learn about the four Authentic Personality Types in What’s Your Mom Type? Discovering God’s Design for You.